Be generous with yourself

I hope readers in the US enjoyed the Thanksgiving holiday last week, and that the spirit of gratitude resonates for you in meaningful ways, wherever you live.

Now that the holiday season is “officially” underway, our inboxes are filled and the media is focused on ads and headlines about sales, and messages urging us to buy gifts.

I have always enjoyed choosing gifts for people I love. Finding something special for someone I care about, and presenting it beautifully, feels like a gift I give myself. Of course, when the gift delights the recipient, that doubles the joy.

In addition to giving gifts to others, have you thought about someone special who you often overlook?

What gifts are you giving to yourself?

Generosity is magical, yet we tend to focus exclusively on giving to others.

I invite you to think about what you can give yourself now.

Why?

Because you are amazing and you deserve so much! 

• You deserve time for yourself — time to rest, to be with special people, to indulge in small pleasures that lift your spirits.

• You deserve to be surrounded by beauty and things that bring you joy.

• You deserve love — to be with people who are loving, to receive love, and to treat yourself lovingly.

• You deserve support and help. It will lighten your load and make faster, easier changes possible for you.

• You deserve to be yourself — to feel free and to authentically express yourself.

• You deserve abundant happiness.

• You deserve to dream big.

How big a vision can you gift yourself now?

After you shower yourself with gifts of time, beauty, love, and help, and focus on how much you deserve, you will be in an ideal frame of mind (and heart) to start dreaming about the year ahead.

The gift of dreaming big, to live your best life, is one I hope you will make a focus.

Shaping a vision for yourself is the first step to creating what you deeply desire.

And it does not take more energy to dream a big dream than a small one, so why not let yourself imagine something amazing?

Then write about it.

And draw it — stick figures and simple sketches are meaningful and will help you make the vision tangible!

Share your vision with people near and dear, who want the best for you and will not judge you.

And savor your vision! Add details as you imagine yourself and your life at this time next year.

Take a small step in that new direction today

What action can you take today that will move you toward a desire in your heart? Even taking a small step that is just past the edge of your comfort zone will be meaningful.

The cumulative impact of taking many small steps (even tiny small steps!) can add up to bigger change than you might imagine.

And if you feel stuck, or want help shaping a bold vision, or know that support to take action will help you start creating meaningful change in your life, we can hop on a quick call and talk about what’s in the way for you. 

Email me and we’ll make a date. (No cost or obligation. I am happy to help you gain clarity, so you can begin creating the life you truly want.)

How this important week can impact your life

This is a momentous week. We started by celebrating Martin Luther King Jr., whose life and legacy have inspired us for decades.

Dr. King led bravely and he inspired us to dream — to dream of a time when there would be justice and equality for all people in this nation.

He famously said that the arc of the moral universe is long but it bends toward justice.

We have been living through a time when the bend of the arc toward justice has been tested in terrible ways. I am grateful that we are moving toward justice in a significant way this week, even as we know there is still enormous important work to be done.

It feels to me that we are on the precipice of a new beginning as a nation.

We are ushering in new leadership that is committed to moving us all forward — beyond divisions, robustly addressing the devastating pandemic and the restoration of our economy, forging ahead to tackle climate change and make big headway toward righting racial injustice, and so much more.

This is the time we can all dream of a brighter future, and all contribute to making that future a reality.

Each of us can dream — dream about the biggest, best ways to show up in our lives, and to bring all of our gifts into the world.

When we allow ourselves to dream big, and when we then each bring commitment to doing our work in the best ways possible, that great work — whatever it is — contributes to creating a better world.

What is your dream?

What do you long to do, and to have? How do you want to grow and expand? What will it take for your dreams to become your reality?

Start by considering who you need to BE in your life for your dreams to be realized.

Do you need to be bolder? Do you need to attend to your self-care to be strong and healthy and rested enough to do your genius work?

Do you need to create quiet, so you are not distracted and hectic all the time?

Do you need to believe in your gifts and build confidence?

Do you need to be more decisive? Do you need to set healthy boundaries? Do you need to have courageous conversations?

The foundation for realizing your dreams begins with considering who you need to BE each day, how you want to show up in the world.

Begin to step into the person you want to be

Start with awareness as you move through your days.

Check in with yourself to notice when you are on auot-pilot (such as pulling back from opportunities, or packing too many things into an already-crammed schedule, or snapping at people you love).

Layer on belief

Start with belief in yourself, that it is possible for you to make these changes. Make a practice of journaling, or meditation, or creating a mantra to repeat, or whatever will help you build the belief that you can make these changes.

Next add commitment

Commit to being self-aware and to actually shifting into the new ways of being that you are focused on. Think about where and when you most need to show up in this new way. It may be at work, or with family, or the way you write your marketing materials, or develop your skills. Make reminders for yourself. (I recommend making colorful post-it note reminders for yourself and placing them around your house where you will see them often.)

Get help if you need a guide

Hire a coach, join a coaching program, or ask a close friend to be your accountability partner as you build the new “muscles” — of confidence, boldness, decisiveness, slowing down, or whatever other ways you determined you want to BE in your life, so that you can create the reality you dream of.

You don’t have to do this alone! And getting help will not only accelerate the pace of bringing your dreams into reality, it will ease the process.

This is the perfect time for you to make your dreams real!

Latch on to the positive, hopeful energy around you.

Say “No” to fear or doubt if those feelings show up.

Let love — for yourself and for the world — fuel your efforts. Aim to say yes to love — to love for yourself, and love for everyone around you.

To quote Dr. King:
Darkness cannot drive out darkness;
only light can do that.
Hate cannot drive out hate;
only love can do that.

Today is the day to begin! Today is the day you can be the light, powered by love, to be the person who will make her dreams her reality, and thereby make the world a better place.

As you begin, and as you stay committed to the process, you will be a part of a huge force for good, for expansion, and for building a beautiful future for people everywhere.

I look forward to hearing from you if you want to talk about creating the life you dream of. Hit reply and we’ll make a date.

Stay safe and well, and keep creating.

3 life-changing questions to ask now

We are about to say good-bye to 2020.

As eager as we all are to move ahead and leave this challenging year behind, let’s not rush. We have an important opportunity to reflect on 2020 before the turn of the calendar.

After all, when we fail to look back at what we can learn, we lose the opportunity for precious insights that can support us in the future.

Three great questions to ask yourself now

1. What are you proud of?

Acknowledging ourselves is really important — something many of us never do. We need to celebrate things we have accomplished, our resilience in the face of difficulties, ways we have grown over time, and good that we have done.

Spend some time reflecting and writing down all the things this year for which you are proud when you look back at 2020. And don’t skip the small stuff — it all counts!

When you have your list, savor it all. Hold that goodness in your heart and own the pride.

2. What can you let go of?

We all carry limiting stories, grievances, self-critical thinking, resentment, fears, and more that limit us. This is a perfect time to think about what you want to leave behind in 2020.

Write down all the things you want to let go of.

You may see that some things on your list can be easier to stop, while others may be entrenched and hard to let go of. That’s ok.

This is an exercise in awareness. Without awareness, we drift. And when we drift we fail to address changes we want to make.

You can make a note of the items you believe will be fairly easy to drop and put the list where you will see it each day. If you can catch yourself holding onto or returning to any of the items, you’ll have a ready reminder to try and let go.

For the more challenging things you want to drop, you might start a journal and dive into exploring their hold on you, as well as ways you might begin to let go of them, bit by bit.

3. What is your vision for 2021?

Rather than starting the new year as if it’s just another day, this is a perfect time to set a vivid vision for your new year.

I am not talking about making a resolution to exercise more, or stop a bad habit.

Think bigger.

Connect to what your heart desires.

What do you want to create next year?
How do you want to live big?

What are you excited to explore, to test, to step into, to go after?

When we set a vision we bring focus to our lives. And what we focus on is what we get.

It’s not about magical thinking.

Rather, it’s about setting clear intentions and staying committed to the vision — even when that means we need to expand to do new things that are not in our comfort zone.

Give yourself a gift as the year ends

Whether you were showered with gifts during the holidays or not, the gift I am recommending is different.

A magnificent gift you can bestow on yourself now is the gift of time.

Devote some precious time to reflecting on all that you can celebrate as you moved through what was a uniquely difficult year. Move on to considering what you decided you want to leave behind as you turn the corner to a new year. And savor the vision for what you want for yourself in 2021.

And if you are unsure about your vision for 2021, you may want to join me to create a vision board — this is another wonderful gift you can bestow on yourself.

I am excited to lead my Dream Big Vision Board Workshop online, on Sunday, January 17.

No matter where you live, you can join me for a powerful and meaningful experience that will bring you clarity and inspiration for the year you want to create in 2021. Registration is open now!

Wishing you an abundant new year filled with health, joy, love, peace, and all good things.

Stay safe and well, and keep creating.

Is it time to turn things around?

It’s already mid-December. I can’t figure out how it snuck up on me so fast!

As we near the end of this intense and challenging year, I am reflecting on the months behind me, and looking ahead at a new year just around the corner.

No matter how this year has unfolded, we have the opportunity to reflect and learn from how we navigated the last months, and consider what we want to create in our lives going forward.

What I see when I look back.

There’s been a lot of opportunity for which I am grateful, and affirmation that I was able to move forward even when unexpected challenges showed up.

In January I launched my book, Live Big: A Manifesto for a Creative Life. My plans for doing bookstore readings and speaking certainly did not materialize as I expected! But I found new ways to spread the word, speaking virtually, reaching out to do podcast interviews, and more.

While different than I had planned, new approaches were not only effective, but enjoyable. And virtual events enabled me to make excellent distant connections.

My painting class at SMFA went virtual in March. By staying committed, even on Zoom I was able to learn, and my work has progressed in ways I was not sure would be possible.

While clients were in a state of suspended animation in the early spring, by May I was supporting new clients who decided there was no time like the present to take charge of their lives and create their futures.

I also used this time to create a new program, Live Big Live! to support the accomplished women I love to coach. This exciting experience proved to be remarkable, and I am thrilled to be offering it again.

While unable to be with my children and grandchildren as usual, we were able to quarantine and briefly be together a few times, and we have a new Facetime ritual that is very special. Zoom calls with extended family have also been a gift that keeps us connected over the miles.

And even having suffered a terrible loss when my mother died this summer, I am moving through the grief with the comfort of feeling her presence in my life in new ways. My connection with my father is richer than ever, too.

I certainly long for life as it was before the pandemic, but I am deeply grateful for all the ways I was able to be resilient.

What lessons are there for you?

When you look back at the last months, what do you observe? Was there struggle? Were you able to create new ways to cope and thrive? There may well have been ups and downs.

Whether the year has had a lot of challenges or went well, can you look back now and glean insights? Can those insights help you move into 2021 with more resourcefulness and agency?

There’s no time like the present to start living big!

While we can learn from the past, dwelling on the past is counterproductive. We can only move forward, and there is always opportunity to create in new ways. Our future is created by us — when we take action, and also when we choose to do nothing.

If you choose to act, rather than live with the consequences of drifting, I am happy to share several good opportunities.

I am excited to be joining my long-time coach and colleague, Peleg Top, to lead a virtual Vision Board Party on Sunday, December 13. Register to join us to get clear about your vision for the new year and make a fabulous vision board to inspire you! (All proceeds are being donated to charity.)

I will also be a featured speaker on the Anchoring the Consciousness of Oneness World Summit, that is focused on the concept of “oneness” in mind, body and spirit. The Summit runs December 21 to 27, and by registering you can access the content through April 2021.

And, you can make a bigger commitment to yourself and your future, by taking a deep dive with me and a remarkable group of women to create a clear vision for your 2021, and dynamically creating that future. The next Live Big Live! — my new signature program — is about to begin. Check out what the first group had to say about their experience.

If you want to hear more, let’s have a Live Big Breakthrough Call to explore the fit for you. I’ll be glad to help you gain perspective about what’s limiting you now, and what’s possible in your life, to see your path to living the life you yearn for. (Book with me today, as we're embarking soon!)

Stay safe and well, and keep creating.

Pair gratitude and vision to live big!

Now that Thanksgiving is in the rear view mirror, many of us have focused on gratitude and moved on.

After all, today’s the first day of December, and I hear that people are already decorating for Christmas.

For many it’s exciting to be on to the next holiday, and the next effort to bring some light to a time when it's dark, getting colder, and there’s a clear realization that our need to stay separate from friends and family is going to continue for quite a while.

Let’s not leave a focus on gratitude behind now!

Gratitude has deep meaning for me — I devoted a chapter to the topic in my book Live Big. It’s certainly not a one-time-a-year subject.

As I work with my clients, the opportunity to practice gratitude inevitably comes into the work. And while the concept is met with varying degrees of enthusiasm, when my clients make it a focus it always proves to be valuable.

And last week I was honored to be part of a Gratitude Gathering that my coach and colleague, Peleg Top, created. Take a listen to the wonderful program here. (My segment is the first after Peleg’s opening remarks.)

I also highly recommend this episode of Hidden Brain, hosted by Shankar Vedantam and featuring David DeSteno, Professor of Psychology at Northeastern University. You will gain fascinating insight into the ways that gratitude improves health and well-being, and how a practice of gratitude can actually help you achieve your goals.

How can gratitude fuel a richer life for you?

As discussed in the three Gratitude Gathering segments, and in the Hidden Brain podcast episode, you can bring gratitude into your life in a range of interesting ways.

Choose the way or ways that feel most appealing to you and see what happens in your life.

Your foundation of gratitude can inform a fresh vision, too.

As you bring more gratitude into your life, you are able to set a brighter, bigger vision for yourself.

I have two invitations for you.

1. Join me on December 13, when I’ll again partner with Peleg Top, as a guest teacher for a virtual Vision Board Party. Making a vision board now is a great way to step into 2021 with clarity. I would love for you to be there.

2. To give yourself a bigger gift to create your best future— to set a big new vision with extraordinary clarity and deep guidance and support — Live Big Live! may be a perfect fit for you. This powerful new program, that I created last summer, was life-changing for the first group of women who experienced it. (You can see and hear these women describe their experiences and outcomes yourself.)

The next Live Big Live! will launch soon, and will support another great group of like-minded women to close out 2020 on a high note and move into 2021 as remarkable creators of the visions they are guided to define for their futures.

The first step to explore this opportunity is to schedule a Live Big Breakthrough Call with me. (Book a call soon, as the next Live Big Live! is right around the corner and there are only a few spots still available.) Whether or not we both think Live Big Live! is right for you now, I will be glad for us to talk.

Stay safe and well, and keep creating.

Now is the time to shape your vision. Here’s how.

It’s easy — and comfortable — to focus only on the day-today, where you are now. When you keep doing the things that come easily, things you do out of habit, and living the way you’re used to, on and on without question, you cheat yourself.

When you never sit back and take a long view you fail to consider big questions and new possibilities.

What you do now matters in the long term!

Because when you live without pausing to consider what you really want, and what it will take to shift to make that desire our reality, you stay stuck where you are.

After all, when you keep doing things the same way, you are sure to get the same results.

It may feel challenging to get your head around asking big questions about the life you want to live, and what changes may be needed to make it a reality.

Why not set aside a few minutes to get clear? My 6-part framework is a great way to approach the process.

Look ahead and consider 6 key domains of your life

Sit back in a quiet spot and get comfortable. Have a notebook handy, and maybe a cup of tea.

Close your eyes and think about your life a few months from now, and a year from now. Ask yourself what you want that life to look like. What can you envision that connects to the desires in your heart?

Think about your work

Do you want to make changes — either in the kind of work you do, where you do it, the level you yearn to reach, or who you want to work with each day? Do you want your work to have a bigger impact, or a new focus?

Think about your relationships

Are there any relationships in your life that you realize your are tolerating, that you want to change, or maybe end? Are there some relationships you miss and want to add? Are there some you want to focus on and improve? Are there some wonderful relationships that you want to make a bigger part of your day-to-day life?

Think about your environment

Consider your living space and your work space. Does your environment support your well-being? Are there pockets of clutter around you that sap your energy? Is your environment calm, does it function well, is it a pleasure to live in? Do you have adequate comfort? Do you have access to nature, if that matters to you? What would make your environment more supportive of your day-to-day happiness?

Think about your physical and emotional well-being

Are you eating well? Are you getting enough regular exercise? Do you move in ways that make you happy, or do you want to switch things up? How is the quality of your sleep? Do you get enough rest each day? Are you irritable or content?

Think about your spirit

Does your spirit soar, or do you feel discontent or restless? Do you have a spiritual practice, or wish for a more satisfying one? Do you feel connected to your purpose? Do you trust and believe in yourself? Do you feel inspired and hopeful?

Think about the legacy you want to leave

Have you paused to think about your legacy? What are you doing now that will leave a mark that matters to you — be it with those closest to you, or that will impact your community, or maybe the world? What can you bring into your life, or make a focus, that will leave a meaningful legacy?

After spending time with these questions, you may have a few notes or pages of thoughts!

Consider what showed up in your notes

Do you realize that you want to step into a bigger, clearer, more intentional life? Do you envision being on a path to a life that will light you up in bigger ways?

The vision for your future might be focused on your work, on more personal expression, on the quality of your relationships, or a combination of factors that will bring you joy and satisfaction.

Savor the images that light up your heart. Sit with them, and begin to see them as your future reality.

Now is the perfect time to make your vision a reality

It can feel wonderful to envision a new future, and in the next breath it can feel really scary to think about stepping out of your comfort zone.

It can feel daunting to imagine yourself making the changes you envision in any (or several) of the domains — or even figuring out what first steps you can take.

It is easy to feel overwhelmed and so afraid that you do nothing.

But doing nothing to stay comfortable in the short-term eclipses the possibilities for big benefits down the road.

Maybe, if you think about it, it’s actually scarier to keep living the same way you are now, and never creating the life you truly desire.

Let’s talk about your fears, and the life you really want

If you are serious about exploring what it looks like to begin making your vision a a reality, let’s have a conversation.

On a Live Big Breakthrough Call you can share both the changes you want to make in your future, and the fears and obstacles that are in the way. I promise that you will gain new insights and perspective.

And if you want to hear about my coaching programs (including the next Live Big Live!), and if I believe the fit is good, we’ll talk about the possibilities for working together.

I believe that everything great begins with a meaningful conversation. I welcome you to make a date with me today.

Are you ready for a new beginning?

This is a big week for me.

It started on a great note — the tension of waiting for the election outcome ended, and the result fills me with optimism and hope for all that is possible for our country.

I am thrilled, too, that a woman has been elected to be our next vice president. And, equally momentous, it is great that a woman of color will hold this high office.

And I will be celebrating my birthday this week. I am grateful to look ahead to a year of so many new possibilities.

New beginnings feel wonderful.

We need not wait for a landmark election, or a birthday, or anything else to think about what is possible for ourselves.

We are always able to take a fresh look, connect to what we truly want to create in our lives, and begin.

For me, living big began with finding a clear vision, asking, “What do I want to create?”

It took some time to shape the clear vision I have today — to lead a movement, so that women (and men) everywhere believe in their ability to powerfully create the lives they want.

And here’s where my vision gets even bigger: As more and more people step into creating the futures that matter to them, they inspire everyone they touch. Vast numbers of people wlll believe that they, too, can be remarkable creators of the futures they desire.

What can it look like to start creating a new vision?

The first step is having clarity about what you want. And having considered that big question, you need to get clear about who you need to be to make your desires a reality.

You may focus on these big questions and find your answers, or you may want to be guided to this clarity — and to begin stepping into a new beginning.

I’ll share a few examples to illustrate what it looks like to get clear about what you want and to step into becoming the person you need to be to make that a reality.

Can you relate to these stories?

• One of the remarkable women who was at my Live Big Live! retreat last month, realized she needed to show up each day in a new way to move forward to a future where she has more agency in her life and more influence in her work. She has begun setting clear boundaries, speaking with more intention, and making self-care a high priority. She is already seeing a big change in the impact she is having in her work, as well as in her close relationships. She is on her way to knowing the career move to pursue next, and she is living a more rewarding life each day.

• Another woman realized how important joy is in her life, and she connected to a deep desire to bring joy to others. She yearns for people everywhere to understand how meaningful it is to choose to bring more joy into everyday life. She is filled with excitement about the many ways she is already stepping into her vision, and the impact she is seeing in others.

• A third woman, who had recently launched a new consulting practice, has more clarity than ever about what she stands for, how she wants to shape her business, how big it can be, and how much of an impact she can have in her industry. She is already signing on new clients who are inspired by her clear leadership and responding to the new ways she’s started to reach out.

How are you inspired? What do you want to create?

If you are feeling optimistic and encouraged about the future we are moving into in our nation, how can you bring that same energy into your life?

Are you content with your status quo, or can you envision new levels of growth, new possibilities, and more joy and satisfaction?

It may feel daunting to imagine taking steps to live a bigger life. For many people, just getting clear about they want is challenging.

If you hear a voice saying that it’s time to get clear about what’s possible, honor that voice. Listen to it, and take a small step to get curious and explore what living big can look like for you.

You might do some journal-writing or share your thoughts and questions with a trusted friend.

When ideas start taking shape you might create a vision board. (Stay tuned to hear about a virtual vision board party I’ll be leading next month.)

You may want to start testing the waters and try out new ways of thinking, new ways of showing up, new steps to take.

Remember — you don’t have to do it all on your own.

A significant step I took, that led to my biggest growth and transformation, was getting help. I let go of the old belief that I had to do everything myself, and that decision proved to be a huge breakthrough in my life.

If you want to talk about what it might look like to step into a new beginning, and what doing that could be like with support and guidance, I invite you to have a conversation with me. I offer my Live Big Breakthrough Call to women who are ready to set their next vision, who are longing for a life that will light them up as never before.

My promise is that you will gain new insights and perspective on what may be holding you back now, as well as what is possible for you. And if you find you are curious about my coaching programs, and if I believe the fit is good, we can talk about the possibilities for working together.

Let’s all step into this time of new beginnings and create a beautiful future.

Stay safe and well, and keep creating.

Curious about how core values can help you live big?

It won’t surprise you that I have been thinking a lot about my mother, who died on August 21. (If you missed what I wrote about her last week, treat yourself to some inspiration.)

In my reflections, I have been thinking about the core values in her life, that informed the remarkable imprint she left on everyone who knew her.

Core values are front of mind for me these days. In the work I am doing with a group of remarkable women, I am helping each to go through a process of identifying her core values.

Why?

I believe we benefit enormously when we are clear about our guiding principles. We see ourselves with more clarity and insight. We can not only live with more integrity, we can more easily make decisions and choices that are right for us. And we are better able to create futures that align with who we truly are.

What can core values look like?

My mother’s core values, as I saw them, included:

• creating and elevating beauty in all she did, and inspiring others to see and create beauty

• creativity — she was a fantastic artist and her cooking was legendary 

• love — of family and friends, and she created meaningful new relationships with ease

• hospitality — closely related to love, hosting special gatherings gave her great joy

• striving for perfection — sometimes to an extreme

• justice — she believed in the rights of all people to be treated fairly and afforded opportunity

My mother rarely wavered. She was clear about all she believed in. These values guided her each day of her life.

How do a parent’s values influence you?

As my mother’s daughter, all of her values influenced my life.

Like most children, it was natural for me to try and model myself after my mother. This was mostly for the good. I adopted her love of beauty, I actively strive for social justice, and I love deeply. In time, I became an artist.

But occasionally, as in the case of her focus on perfectionism, the influence was not so positive. It has taken me years to be able to aim for excellence without pushing myself to the impossible extreme of perfectionism.

Can you see yourself through the lens of core values?

As we each grow and evolve through life, we become unique individuals. My list of core values has some overlaps with those I see as my mother’s, but it is unique to me. 

My list begins with love. Love is closely followed by creativity that's paired with curiosity. (Following my curiosity has helped to free me from the perfectionism that hampered me for many decades.)

Happiness, joy and gratitude are core for me. My love of beauty came directly from my mother. Exploration — of ideas and new places — is also on my list. 

Leadership paired with vision; justice paired with tolerance; generativity; and accountability paired with resourcefulness round out my list of values.

What about your values?

Have you thought about the values that guide you? If not, I recommend that you set aside some time to think about them, and identify your short list of what is truly central to the way you live.

Of course there are many attributes that matter to all of us. The challenge is to think of those that are most true, through and through, for you.

For instance, there may be lots of things that are important to you, like honesty, or boldness, dependability, honor, grace, success, uniqueness, patriotism, fidelity, piety, diligence, or security — to randomly name a few possibilities. 

When you think about things that ring true, consider if they are core values for you — if they always guide you. You can consider paired values, or related attributes, as I have in my short list above, as you get to your focused list.

And while you might want to think about where your core values originated, be certain all that you claim are yours! Remove anything on your list that’s imposed, or expected of you by others.

Aim to narrow your list to 6 to 8 core values.

How to use your list.

With your core values in hand, you have the opportunity to think about how you want to live into them.

Are there some values you want to expand, or go deeper with? For me, the realization that I had a long-held deep desire to explore more creative expression, but had allowed fear to limit me for so much of my life, finally supported me to enroll in a painting course. When I stopped stifling a core part of myself, and stepped into being an artist, my life changed in ways I never imagined would be so satisfying.

And remember that there are seasons in life when you can bring more focus to some of your values than had been possible at other times. Perhaps you will explore ways to expand the role of a key value as your life circumstances change.

Can you start to see new possibilities for yourself? Are there new ways to live your core values now, and new ways be bring them into your vision for the future, so you will live your biggest, best life?

Where will your core values take you?

Turning your attention to identifying your core values might feel like another “to-do” you don’t have time for. I get it. Life can be hectic.

And, your life can be enriched by creating space to consider what your core values are, and when you use them as a reference.

Making life decisions that are fully aligned with your values is very empowering. You are likely to feel clearer and bolder about your decisions when you have that resource to refer to.

If you would like to talk about core values and how they can help you move beyond what limits you into a future that will light you up, I invite you to schedule a Live Big Breakthrough Call with me.

I would be delighted to help you gain insight and clarity about changes you are seeking to make, and how you can be a powerful creator in your life. 

I look forward to hearing from you.

Stay safe and well, and keep creating.

The big impact of one small thing

Each new week brings change, as life and work slowly evolve.

It may not feel like much is changing, but each small shift — around us and for us — calls on us to adjust anew.

I hear about a range of experiences in my conversations with clients, colleagues and the women on my Saturday Zoom calls.

Some have found a new rhythm that feels great. Some were doing well and then hit a rough spot. Some are anticipating likely changes with their work (positive for some, worrisome for others). Some are initiating significant personal changes.

Wherever you find yourself now, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed at one point or another. Decisions, intentions, options to choose from, opportunities, deadlines — all of these can overwhelm us.

When you feel overwhelmed, try employing this simple yet powerful approach

I recently spoke to a great women who is facing a mountain of things that need to get done. Still healing from a broken arm, she needs to sort through years of belongings and prepare a house for sale. She is also seeking a new apartment. And, she is eager to pursue promising new work opportunities. 

After telling me all of that she started describing her big 5-year vision.

It’s no wonder she reported feeling overwhelmed! 

She was frustrated about not doing “enough,” concerned about getting everything done, and worried about how she’d move toward her beautiful big vision.

As I listened I knew there was a simple suggestion I could make. It has worked for me, and for many of my clients when overwhelm has started to take over.

Focus on doing one thing each day

If you are a “doer” by nature (and perhaps you pride yourself on being a multi-tasker), you may be thinking that such a simple approach is too simple, and will be counter-effective. It sounds like it will make it take longer to get things done. 

Here’s why this works so well.

1. It feels doable.  

It doesn't feel daunting if you just need to chose and take one action as you start your day. 

How often do many of us feel stuck when we feel overwhelmed? Or, we get busy with tasks like doing laundry or scrubbing the sink, or fritter away time in avoidance. Or we jump in frenetically and get splattered, so nothing gets done well. By choosing to do one thing, we can avoid all of these pitfalls.

2. You are focused.  

When one action is all you “need” to do, your attention is not pulled in multiple directions. The results are always better when our attention is fully focused. And the speed with which good things happen when we slow down and focus like this can be impressive.

3. Momentum builds.  

Once you are in action, you feel great and you are are likely to take more action. So, you may continue with that one thing, or shift to a new thing as you keep going.

4. You get a positive emotional hit of accomplishment.  

The feeling of making progress is a huge boost. And when enthusiasm builds, new ideas and more motivation emerge.

5. You set off a positive cycle.  

Good energy keeps things moving, and if you are like the woman I mentioned, you will be delighted at how much is getting accomplished and how great it feels. You, like she, are likely to start each day feeling upbeat and able to move through that one thing — and often more!

We have so much opportunity — today and every day.

Not only can we avail ourselves of opportunities all around us, we can face new challenges as they come up, and we can create in remarkable ways. It all begins with our state of mind.

Just as the woman I described has done, you can harness your energy as you start each day. Focus on one thing, and do it! You are likely to see big results, as she has.

Let me know if this is something you have tried. And if you use this approach for the first time, I’d love to hear how it works for you. Hit reply and let me know. 

Here are 3 ways to get more ideas and more support

1. Check out the growing list of resources and ideas on the Thriving Now page on my website. 

2. Join me for the next Creating Our Way Forward Zoom call on Saturday, May 30 at 3:00pm eastern for an intimate conversation when we will connect, share, and learn new ways to cope, stay inspired, and take action. Register for the next call. 

3. Let’s hop on a Live Big Breakthrough Call and talk about what’s standing between you and your biggest desires. I promise that you will gain insights and value from this call — and if the fit feels good we can talk about what coaching could look like in your life. Schedule your Live Big Breakthrough Call here.

Stay safe and well, and keep creating.

What do you yearn to bring into your life, or into the world?

If you have been following the flurry of activity surrounding the launch of my new book, Live Big: A Manifesto for a Creative Life, you are aware of what a big effort has gone into the project.

The journey from first starting to write the book, to having it designed, to sending it off to be printed, to holding my first advance copy, and to the livestream launch party on Thursday evening last week, has called for a lot of commitment over more than 4 years. 

Many people have asked me how I did it. The answer is that bringing this book into the world was big and important to me. 

I truly believe in the power of creativity to help us all live our biggest and best lives — and my mission is to start a Creative Movement! 

I did not have that huge vision when I first started to write the book, but in time I realized that through the book I could spread the word about the ways we can all learn to live ever-expanding, big authentic lives. And I wanted the news to reach and impact people far and wide. 

Why? 

Because every day I see the way that embracing and living all of your greatness ripples out to make families better, workplaces better, communities better, and ultimately — especially if enough of us bring this work into our lives — to make the world better.

Yes, that's a BIG idea! I truly believe it is possible. And while I could say to myself that the book is now available, so I’ve done it all, I am committed to continuing to build the movement.

Is there something in your life that you feel is important to pursue? 

Is it something you believe can make a difference? 
Is it something worth sticking with rather than allowing it to peter out?
Things that often stop people who have an idea, include:

• Fatigue

• A busy life

• A lack of believing in your ability to do it — whether that’s because the idea is so big, or because it feels too hard to make it real 

• Feeling it's not really important enough, or it’s too small, and thus not worth the commitment and effort. 

If any of that resonates for you, I urge you to take a closer look. Reconsider. Because when something lights up your heart — even if it starts with a just small flicker — it's worth paying attention.

Your focus may touch only you or a small number of people. Maybe you want to mend a family rift. Maybe you want to make a change that will impact your neighbors or the local school. Maybe you want to start a creative practice of some kind, for your own personal satisfaction.

These, as well as big audacious ambitions, are all important! 

I urge you to start.

Dream. Explore. Test. Let it evolve and change if it needs to. 

And if you feel it's on track, stick with it! Even when life interferes and there are interruptions (as there always will be), keep the flame alive and let it grow!

Because even things we see as having a small impact will have a ripple effect. And ripples can go wide — so wide that we often do not ever know all the ways those ripples move into the world.

Thank you for bringing your gifts, and ideas, and dreams into the world. We need all of that genius and goodness! 

And, if I can help, let’s talk. I could not have brought my vision to fruition without support. I would be honored to help you.

Stepping up in your life — or playing safe

After a powerful session with the women in my 4-month group coaching program, I reflected and realized how far each of them has come in the work. We are 3 months in, and while each woman has had a different focus for the work she’s doing in her life, each is courageously stepping up in ways that are impressive. They are all saying “YES” to their lives.

Observing their great work inspired me to share stories about what it has meant for these women to move beyond their comfort zones — which each of them has been doing.

What does it take to make bold moves?
How do you get started?
How do you stay on track, even when challenges arise?

Here is the first story in a series that I want to share with you.

What does it take to set a vision and step into action in spite of hesitance, resistance, and even fear?

1. Step one: Setting a big goal

Creating a long-range goal that entails stepping up to do something new — and something that’s outside of the space you operate in successfully and feel comfortable with today — requires courage.

When you have a big "Why" for something you really want to go for, you can more easily create a big goal.

My client has a vision for work she wants to do in five years. Is it a stretch? Yes. Is it important to her for a number of fundamental reasons? Yes. Knowing why it means so much to her helped her to get clear about what it will take to make it a reality and commit to moving ahead.

2. Step two: Getting started

Taking early steps was not so hard for this motivated woman. She reached out for coaching support. She used her network to meet with other women who had succeeded in doing what she wants to do and got their advice. She’s been doing research into this new kind of work and what it takes to get it. She joined a group of other women on this path in order to get education from the program and support from peers.

3. Step three: Keeping the momentum going

After getting the ball rolling, she hit a snag. It was time to begin creating a document to use to pursue this new work and a host of self-critics showed up.

First, the Impostor Syndrome came calling and asked: who is she to go for such a big opportunity? It reminded her that she does not have all of the typical expertise that is often sought after. And, Perfectionism showed up to impede her. She doubted that her efforts would be “good enough." These, in turn, invited Procrastination to join the party. Weeks went by without a single word written.

Coaching provided an antidote to the trio of self-critics. The first thing we addressed was helping her to believe that the distinctive expertise she has to offer is, in fact, important to many forward-looking organizations. An article in a respected business publication confirmed that fact. She was then able to acknowledge and own her expertise and ease up on the grip of the Imposter Syndrome. 

Perfectionism and Procrastination were shooed away by her making a commitment to write a really bad first rough draft of her document. After that she knows she can trust herself to edit it and get input from others to polish and refine the work.

This woman is now fully on track to moving into a bigger future, knowing how she will be able to move through each phase of the process she is mapping out. And, the lessons she is learning and skills she is building as she pursues this big goal are helping her in her current work, as well as having a positive impact on her personal life.

Will she run into other challenges of confidence or resistance? Will fear show up as she moves ahead? Undoubtedly.

But, having a strong system in place to get the support and advice she needs will keep her moving forward. As well, she knows that these resources will accelerate her progress compared to going it alone.

I welcome you to comment below or email me and let me know about the big dreams you have, and how you are pursuing them — or, if you’re playing it safe but yearn to say “Yes!” to your life in new ways. What are your questions about getting started?

And, if you are curious to learn about private coaching, or the impact of my group coaching programs (I’m launching a new group program this fall), click on over to inquire about coaching. When you complete and submit the Coaching Inquiry Form, I’ll be in touch to make a date with you.

A different kind of top-10 list

With the holidays upon us and the last days of the year winding down, top-10 lists will soon start showing up. We have all seen the typical lists of the top-10 films of the year, the top-10 world events, etc. In thinking about top-10s — which for me would include things like a significant birthday celebrated, the marriage of my nephew, coaching remarkable and inspiring clients, and a memorable trip to Paris — I decided to be grateful for all of those things, but to take a little different approach to thinking about how I want to compile my top-10 this time around.

I am thinking about the top 10 things I have learned that I want to take into the new year.

1. To start, I’m focusing on what I want to leave behind from this last year.

By reflecting on what went well and what things went awry this year, I will be able to leave behind habits and practices that I know do not serve me well. This will open the way for more of what I want to bring into my new year. What will I leave behind? For one, timidity. I have learned that when I take a step that feels big, and even a bit scary, it's always better than shrinking back. I will also no longer chase after every interesting idea I get or every opportunity that comes my way. I’ve learned that these distract me from my big priorities. Do you get the idea?

2. After reflecting on my last year, I will decide on the key things I want to create in this coming year and I will choose a word for my year.

When I have clearly defined my top priorities, for my personal life and my work, selecting a word that will guide me will follow. (I wrote about choosing a word of the year last December, and many people wrote to tell me they carefully chose a word to guide their year, too.) I learned that having my word was meaningful and inspiring, and that it was great to post my word where I saw it daily. I know this year’s word will help me to be focused and on-target, both with my new priorities and with how I want to live.

3. I will celebrate my achievements in this year and commit to celebrating my coming achievements in the new year.

We often lose sight of the things we have accomplished and achieved as we rush through our days — especially the small things that can have so much meaning. When we take the time to savor and celebrate ourselves for our successes, and celebrate things what we might overlook (such as trying out something new that is not a sure bet, or having a tough conversation rather than avoiding it), we encourage ourselves, and can appreciate that we are learning new skills and are growing in important ways.

4. I will make my visions visible.

For me, this includes making a vision board every 3 to 6 months. Creating a vision board is an incredible process, and the completed board provides a way for me to look at what I want to bring into my life on a daily basis, so I do not lose sight of what I want to manifest. Making things visible also includes writing down the top three things I will commit to each week and posting the list where I will see it often. The act of committing things to paper, and seeing them, is powerful.

5. I will get more help and support.

Last year I began to work with a great bookkeeper and wondered why I had waited so long to do that. My coaches are a big part of my support system, and I look forward to continuing my work with them. This year, I will begin to work with a virtual assistant to free me from daily tasks that take time away from doing the things that matter most to me and things that only I can do. I will also do more work with a great professional organizer to start the year with an updated filing system for my business, and to help me clear accumulated clutter in my office and home. And, I will think about other kinds of help and support I can enlist to make this a great year.

6. I will have weekly Accountability Calls with a colleague.

This is a practice I started in last year. In every call, we each report on what we accomplished in the past week, where we struggled, and what we learned, and we declare our top three priorities for the coming week. We close by picking a word to be our theme for the week. This has been a remarkable practice.

7. I will take excellent care of myself.

Having experienced a series of health challenges this year that are now, happily, resolved, I am well aware of the importance of careful self-care. I will pay special attention to what I eat and to my exercise routine. I will create a new daily practice that includes quiet meditation each morning, so that I will be centered, calm, and clear as I start each day. I will be tuned in to what causes me stress, and work to reduce those influences — and I’ll actively clear any stress that does come up.

8. I will show up, engage in constructive conversations, and take action related to civic causes about which I care deeply.

Current political developments are calling me to think creatively and partner effectively to be a force for sustaining and improving civil rights, ensuring social justice, building tolerance, protecting the environment, and more.

9. I will create as never before.

I know that when I write from my heart, and when I paint, and when I think creatively, and when I experiment freely, my life is enriched. Difficult emotions are transformed, I am fueled and inspired, I learn and grow, and I engage with others in amazing ways. I will also visit museums and galleries, attend live theater, music, and dance performances, and read as many great books as I am able. Creativity that I engage in and that I experience connects me to big, new ideas and accelerates inspiration.

10. I will live with love as a driver.

I know that love is powerful and positive, and that is what I want to be. I know that love is an antidote to fear and anxiety. So, I will continue to make “love” my watchword, as I have been especially focused on doing recently. I will check in with myself and ask if I am I serving myself, my family, my clients, my community, and the world with a full heart, and if I am modeling love and tolerance for those around me.

I am looking ahead to the next year with the desire to live bigger than ever. That desire informed my top-10 list entries. What will you include on your forward-looking top-10 list? How will you create the best year ever?

Let me know if you are making a top-10 list, and what your list (or lists) include. I would love to hear your thoughts on the topic.

All my best wishes for the upcoming holidays and a BIG and happy year. Let's all look ahead to a year filled with love, creativity, joy, abundance and peace.