You can let go of fear and perfectionism, too!

It’s June! As we head into the summer, and having been vaccinated so we can start reconnecting with the world, I am reflecting on what was happening in my life last year at this time.

Of course, we were in lockdown and unsure about how long our confined way of living would last. Months of living in the pandemic served as an impetus for me to think about how I wanted to make changes in my life.

That’s when I started to create something new. Something bold.

I realized wanted to work with clients in a new way. I wanted to serve them at an even higher level, so they would reap even bigger results, and I wanted to design a program that would allow for more joy in my life.

I yearned for more time to write and more time to paint. I craved more unscheduled space in my life, which is something I help my clients do all the time, but had not done so much for myself. It was time to make a change.

My creative process was different last year than in the past

Like many people, when I embark on creating something big from scratch, I feel excited anticipation mixed with feelings of uncertainty about the outcome.

Years ago, that uncertainty made me super-nervous. I had been a perfectionist for most of my life.

Because I was so consumed with being sure the outcomes would be great, there were things I dreamed of doing but never started. And there were things I started and either did not finish, or spent so much time perfecting that they took way longer to bring into the world than they might have. I also endure a huge amount of stress along the way.

But having learned to be a creator in every part of my life over the last decade, I now welcome the process of diving in, ideating, testing, iterating, and seeing how things go. Going through the creative process without trepidation is amazing!

I trust myself and find joy in creating in a bold way — even when the quality of the end product can’t be foreseen or guaranteed at the start.

What I created changed me, and changed my clients

What I launched last August was my first Live Big Live! program — the first of what are now three retreats I lead each year.

And I just had the joy of leading the third Live Big Live! — for Spring 2021. The retreat took place last Thursday, Friday and Saturday and I am still processing the experience.

And while every part of the three days we spent together at the retreat was amazing, the program actually started 45 days before. I decided, as I created the program, that I wanted women to have a deeper experience than would be possible if we came together for three days without a foundation.

The remarkable group of women in this cohort started on their path to Living Big on April 18. They were immersed in a 6-week preparatory journey together. It provided self exploration and enabled them to arrive at the retreat having bonded as a group, and ready to do truly transformative work.

I witnessed each of them step into new ways of trusting themselves, and I witnessed them release fear.

I witnessed generous support for one another as they each went deep into their hearts to connect to their desires and shape their visions for the future.

I also witnessed them do powerful creative work each day at the retreat, where clarity emerged, insights appeared and new possibilities were realized.

And while we hit on many tender places and tears were shed from time to time, I witnessed joy, delight and celebration.

I have been able to combine the power of group and private coaching, and usher in life-changing transformations in ways that bring me enormous joy. This creative endeavor, that I initiated a year ago, has resulted in all of the outcomes I was seeking.

What are you ready to create in your life?

Is it time for you to figure out what’s next, or get unstuck? Time to stop living with fear as the driver? Time to get help navigating a transition? Are you ready to break through barriers in your work or business, or reach higher than ever before? Do you sense there’s more that’s possible for you, but cannot figure it out?

The next Live Big Live! will kick off in mid-August, for a retreat at the start of October. I am already in conversation with women about the next retreat, and I am delighted that it will be live again (as we were able to be last October).

It’s not too soon to think about this opportunity.

If you are ready to bring remarkable change into your life with love, support, and guidance, and ready to create your future with clarity and confidence, let’s talk soon.

To learn more about Live Big Live! and to see if you’d be a fit to join us, you can set up a free call with me.

Stay safe and well, and keep creating.

We're in a season of change. What kind is right for you now?

It’s exciting to see spring bust out all around us, and wonderful to be out and about so much more.

Do you feel inspired? Do you feel ready for new things, new experiences, and maybe some change?

Spring is the perfect time to bring change into your life, and especially this year, having been so limited in so many ways for so long.

What kinds of change do you long for now?

Why not start by considering possible changes in a number of categories. Some offer small opportunities for sparking your life and some are weightier. Which of these can enrich you now?

Think about how you dress.

Many of us have been wearing comfy clothes during the pandemic and the long dark winter from which we just emerged. Lots of us settled for drab colors, too, not thinking much about the impact of the clothes we choose each day. Why not go for wearing fabrics and colors and adornments that make you feel beautiful? This small daily change can give you a big lift!

Color can have a big impact!

Consider emphasizing the colors in your environment. Which make you happy? Which bring back lovely memories? Perhaps colors you associate with the beach and water delight you, or rich jewel tones make you feel great. What changes would light you up, if you add or change colors — in the clothes you choose, flowers you bring into your home, the food on your plate, the art on your walls (or the paint color!), or even the dish towels you use each day?

What are you eating now?

The statistics on weight gain during the pandemic are startling. But even if you have not put on weight, this is the perfect season to focus on eating simple, fresh foods. Farmer’s markets are opening! Home gardens, if you have the space and are up for planting, offer fresh veggies and herbs in your own back yard. I have a Sunday ritual of sautéeing and roasting lots of fresh veggies to eat all week, and at this time of year it gets even more fun. With new favorites like asparagus and local fresh berries soon to be in season, it’s exciting to look forward to all of the flavors.

Will you change your ways of moving?

The opportunities for getting exercise get to be more fun in the spring. I know walking has been an important part of coping with isolation for many people (and those with dogs take them out in any weather), but others — like me — have not been that active outside for some time. I am starting to walk more, both in my neighborhood and in nearby places that offer beautiful new surroundings. Perhaps you will try jogging, or tennis. Perhaps you will be able to safely get back to the gym where specialized equipment is available. Perhaps this is the time to do a new kind of yoga, or try kick-boxing. What would feel great for you?

Are you ready for change in your work?

So many women I speak to now are considering their work lives — in a range of ways. Some got a big wake-up call this year and realized they needed to leave a toxic environment, or move on from a field that is no longer making them happy. Some are looking for work, having been in industries that were hard hit. Some have had businesses that made it through, but need to bring them back to full vitality. Some are in a transitional period moving toward retirement. Some launched new consulting practices or ventures that call on them to show up in new and different ways.

If you find yourself facing or wanting change related to your professional life, start with questions like these: What do you want to change? Why is it important for you? What will it take to get started — or keep moving forward?

All change starts with how you think

How do you consider and orient yourself to all that is possible? What’s your frame of mind? Do you believe in yourself, believe that you can explore change and make change?

If you steer your thoughts to curiosity and inquiry, if you connect to what you want, and ask yourself questions like, “What if it’s possible that…?” and “What small next step might I take?” then making change will be easier for you.

If you find yourself veering into negative territory, like doubt or fear, start with reminding yourself of how much you have been able to do in many other moments of your life. Then aim for making small positive changes (like the ones at the top of the list above). See how they light you up and inspire you. Next, remind yourself that you can choose the thoughts to focus on. Consciously choose to focus on curiosity and stay in inquiry.

Next, set intentions

When you are aware of your thinking and start to get an idea for change you want to make, set intentions. Make your intentions clear, but do not get overwhelmed by setting grand intentions.

You may want to start by setting a small intention, such as scheduling 10 minutes to do a new form of stretching when you wake up each day, or trying to cook a new fresh food twice a week.

You may set a somewhat bigger intention related to your career, like reaching out to ask for information from someone in a field you are exploring.

Once you set the intention, commit to following through. You may want to ask someone to help you stay accountable, with a quick daily or weekly check-in.

Aim to make small, incremental change

Even if you long to make a big change in your life, this is the time to take small steps. Small consistent steps are the surest path to reaping big results!

We tend to minimize the importance of small steps. We believe that we must be bold, and go big to make progress and to feel proud of ourselves.

That’s a myth!

Taking small steps, one after another, is an incredibly powerful way to build confidence, build momentum and reach great outcomes. Small consistent steps make us resilient when set-backs show up. We keep going. And we build new habits that serve us well in many dimensions of our lives.

Make the most of this season of opportunity! I would be delighted to hear about the changes you are initiating. Leave a comment to share.

Stay safe and well, and keep creating.

Now is the time to shape your vision. Here’s how.

It’s easy — and comfortable — to focus only on the day-today, where you are now. When you keep doing the things that come easily, things you do out of habit, and living the way you’re used to, on and on without question, you cheat yourself.

When you never sit back and take a long view you fail to consider big questions and new possibilities.

What you do now matters in the long term!

Because when you live without pausing to consider what you really want, and what it will take to shift to make that desire our reality, you stay stuck where you are.

After all, when you keep doing things the same way, you are sure to get the same results.

It may feel challenging to get your head around asking big questions about the life you want to live, and what changes may be needed to make it a reality.

Why not set aside a few minutes to get clear? My 6-part framework is a great way to approach the process.

Look ahead and consider 6 key domains of your life

Sit back in a quiet spot and get comfortable. Have a notebook handy, and maybe a cup of tea.

Close your eyes and think about your life a few months from now, and a year from now. Ask yourself what you want that life to look like. What can you envision that connects to the desires in your heart?

Think about your work

Do you want to make changes — either in the kind of work you do, where you do it, the level you yearn to reach, or who you want to work with each day? Do you want your work to have a bigger impact, or a new focus?

Think about your relationships

Are there any relationships in your life that you realize your are tolerating, that you want to change, or maybe end? Are there some relationships you miss and want to add? Are there some you want to focus on and improve? Are there some wonderful relationships that you want to make a bigger part of your day-to-day life?

Think about your environment

Consider your living space and your work space. Does your environment support your well-being? Are there pockets of clutter around you that sap your energy? Is your environment calm, does it function well, is it a pleasure to live in? Do you have adequate comfort? Do you have access to nature, if that matters to you? What would make your environment more supportive of your day-to-day happiness?

Think about your physical and emotional well-being

Are you eating well? Are you getting enough regular exercise? Do you move in ways that make you happy, or do you want to switch things up? How is the quality of your sleep? Do you get enough rest each day? Are you irritable or content?

Think about your spirit

Does your spirit soar, or do you feel discontent or restless? Do you have a spiritual practice, or wish for a more satisfying one? Do you feel connected to your purpose? Do you trust and believe in yourself? Do you feel inspired and hopeful?

Think about the legacy you want to leave

Have you paused to think about your legacy? What are you doing now that will leave a mark that matters to you — be it with those closest to you, or that will impact your community, or maybe the world? What can you bring into your life, or make a focus, that will leave a meaningful legacy?

After spending time with these questions, you may have a few notes or pages of thoughts!

Consider what showed up in your notes

Do you realize that you want to step into a bigger, clearer, more intentional life? Do you envision being on a path to a life that will light you up in bigger ways?

The vision for your future might be focused on your work, on more personal expression, on the quality of your relationships, or a combination of factors that will bring you joy and satisfaction.

Savor the images that light up your heart. Sit with them, and begin to see them as your future reality.

Now is the perfect time to make your vision a reality

It can feel wonderful to envision a new future, and in the next breath it can feel really scary to think about stepping out of your comfort zone.

It can feel daunting to imagine yourself making the changes you envision in any (or several) of the domains — or even figuring out what first steps you can take.

It is easy to feel overwhelmed and so afraid that you do nothing.

But doing nothing to stay comfortable in the short-term eclipses the possibilities for big benefits down the road.

Maybe, if you think about it, it’s actually scarier to keep living the same way you are now, and never creating the life you truly desire.

Let’s talk about your fears, and the life you really want

If you are serious about exploring what it looks like to begin making your vision a a reality, let’s have a conversation.

On a Live Big Breakthrough Call you can share both the changes you want to make in your future, and the fears and obstacles that are in the way. I promise that you will gain new insights and perspective.

And if you want to hear about my coaching programs (including the next Live Big Live!), and if I believe the fit is good, we’ll talk about the possibilities for working together.

I believe that everything great begins with a meaningful conversation. I welcome you to make a date with me today.

How to realign when you’ve lost momentum

We all get off track from time to time. This happened to me last week. After a great (but hectic) week of business travel I returned to lead a retreat with my group coaching clients. While I loved it all, it wasn’t long before my body had had enough.

I first lost my voice, then lost energy and got achy, and I had no choice but to slow down, rest, and heal for the rest of week two.

Happily, I am now on the mend. But I am facing a big back-log of tasks. 

It’s a challenge to get back in your groove when you have been knocked off course — whether by travel, illness, a family emergency, an emotional rough patch, or anything else.

Here are 3 tips I use to get back on track

1. Go slow

If you are anything like me and the accomplished women I work with, you are an achiever. You work hard — often too hard. This is not the time to follow your impulse is to jump back in and tackle your backlog fast. You will likely sabotage yourself with that approach.

Be thoughtful as you give yourself permission to build up to your usually pace.

Ask yourself these questions:
• What can I delegate, get help with, or defer?
• What to-do's have the highest priority, that I can map on my calendar now?
• What low-hanging fruit can I batch and take care of quickly?
• How can best I communicate to those waiting for replies that I will get back to them soon?

Resist the urge to over-promise. It’s always better to set a reasonable expectation and meet it — or delivery early.

2. Show yourself some love

You may need to set a later wake-up alarm than usual, or skip your usual morning work-out. Or, you may find you have a productive morning and then your energy wanes. Listen to your body! Give yourself the rest, nutrition and movement that you need. 

If your muscles ache, schedule a massage. If a nap will refresh you, go for it! If you are stressed, take a break and meditate, draw, or walk around the block. 

Self care now, coupled with self-compassion, will pay big dividends.

3. Steadily pick up the pace

You will know when you are ready to work a full day again. In most cases, careful pacing and attention to self care will help you to catch up and resume your usual routines fairly quickly.

This is a great time to reflect and reassess. Think about the balance in your life, and the intensity at which you had become accustomed to living. Maybe pushing a bit less hard is a better pace for you in the long run. Maybe you discovered some new ways to work smarter, not harder. Maybe you introduced some self-care that you want to continue and make your ”new normal.“ 

This challenging period can teach you a lot. Take note of your insights.

I'd love for you to share what works best for you at times like these. We can all learn from one another. Or, if you have particular questions, ask them. Leave comments below, or email me, and I can share this feedback in a future post.

Focusing on career questions through a creative lens

Considering big questions about your professional life can be overwhelming. No matter where you are in considering your career — whether it's about making a change, how to start a job search, considering what will make you happiest, preparing for a big interview, how to face emotional issues that arise, and more — bringing creative thinking to the questions and employing creative expression can make all the difference.

A courageous and amazing group of women joined me for a workshop to get clear about the career journeys they are each navigating. We dove deep into identifying the emotions at play for each of them and identifying the attributes related to work that are most important to them. And we addressed the mindset issues that limit them. With all of that insight, the women created collages to pour creative energy into the process and to make a visual creation they can reflect on. Their collages makes their new-found insights vivid for them as they continue on their journeys.

It was a fabulous group, and their work was remarkable.

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If you are interested in group coaching, learn more here. Group coaching programs are an exciting opportunity for women looking for coaching to enrich their lives, resolve limitations and chart a path forward, and do it with a small group of like-minded, supportive women.