We're in a season of change. What kind is right for you now?

It’s exciting to see spring bust out all around us, and wonderful to be out and about so much more.

Do you feel inspired? Do you feel ready for new things, new experiences, and maybe some change?

Spring is the perfect time to bring change into your life, and especially this year, having been so limited in so many ways for so long.

What kinds of change do you long for now?

Why not start by considering possible changes in a number of categories. Some offer small opportunities for sparking your life and some are weightier. Which of these can enrich you now?

Think about how you dress.

Many of us have been wearing comfy clothes during the pandemic and the long dark winter from which we just emerged. Lots of us settled for drab colors, too, not thinking much about the impact of the clothes we choose each day. Why not go for wearing fabrics and colors and adornments that make you feel beautiful? This small daily change can give you a big lift!

Color can have a big impact!

Consider emphasizing the colors in your environment. Which make you happy? Which bring back lovely memories? Perhaps colors you associate with the beach and water delight you, or rich jewel tones make you feel great. What changes would light you up, if you add or change colors — in the clothes you choose, flowers you bring into your home, the food on your plate, the art on your walls (or the paint color!), or even the dish towels you use each day?

What are you eating now?

The statistics on weight gain during the pandemic are startling. But even if you have not put on weight, this is the perfect season to focus on eating simple, fresh foods. Farmer’s markets are opening! Home gardens, if you have the space and are up for planting, offer fresh veggies and herbs in your own back yard. I have a Sunday ritual of sautéeing and roasting lots of fresh veggies to eat all week, and at this time of year it gets even more fun. With new favorites like asparagus and local fresh berries soon to be in season, it’s exciting to look forward to all of the flavors.

Will you change your ways of moving?

The opportunities for getting exercise get to be more fun in the spring. I know walking has been an important part of coping with isolation for many people (and those with dogs take them out in any weather), but others — like me — have not been that active outside for some time. I am starting to walk more, both in my neighborhood and in nearby places that offer beautiful new surroundings. Perhaps you will try jogging, or tennis. Perhaps you will be able to safely get back to the gym where specialized equipment is available. Perhaps this is the time to do a new kind of yoga, or try kick-boxing. What would feel great for you?

Are you ready for change in your work?

So many women I speak to now are considering their work lives — in a range of ways. Some got a big wake-up call this year and realized they needed to leave a toxic environment, or move on from a field that is no longer making them happy. Some are looking for work, having been in industries that were hard hit. Some have had businesses that made it through, but need to bring them back to full vitality. Some are in a transitional period moving toward retirement. Some launched new consulting practices or ventures that call on them to show up in new and different ways.

If you find yourself facing or wanting change related to your professional life, start with questions like these: What do you want to change? Why is it important for you? What will it take to get started — or keep moving forward?

All change starts with how you think

How do you consider and orient yourself to all that is possible? What’s your frame of mind? Do you believe in yourself, believe that you can explore change and make change?

If you steer your thoughts to curiosity and inquiry, if you connect to what you want, and ask yourself questions like, “What if it’s possible that…?” and “What small next step might I take?” then making change will be easier for you.

If you find yourself veering into negative territory, like doubt or fear, start with reminding yourself of how much you have been able to do in many other moments of your life. Then aim for making small positive changes (like the ones at the top of the list above). See how they light you up and inspire you. Next, remind yourself that you can choose the thoughts to focus on. Consciously choose to focus on curiosity and stay in inquiry.

Next, set intentions

When you are aware of your thinking and start to get an idea for change you want to make, set intentions. Make your intentions clear, but do not get overwhelmed by setting grand intentions.

You may want to start by setting a small intention, such as scheduling 10 minutes to do a new form of stretching when you wake up each day, or trying to cook a new fresh food twice a week.

You may set a somewhat bigger intention related to your career, like reaching out to ask for information from someone in a field you are exploring.

Once you set the intention, commit to following through. You may want to ask someone to help you stay accountable, with a quick daily or weekly check-in.

Aim to make small, incremental change

Even if you long to make a big change in your life, this is the time to take small steps. Small consistent steps are the surest path to reaping big results!

We tend to minimize the importance of small steps. We believe that we must be bold, and go big to make progress and to feel proud of ourselves.

That’s a myth!

Taking small steps, one after another, is an incredibly powerful way to build confidence, build momentum and reach great outcomes. Small consistent steps make us resilient when set-backs show up. We keep going. And we build new habits that serve us well in many dimensions of our lives.

Make the most of this season of opportunity! I would be delighted to hear about the changes you are initiating. Leave a comment to share.

Stay safe and well, and keep creating.

How to stay steady in a peak emotional time

If you feel like most people I know, the last days and weeks have been incredibly challenging. On top of concerns about increasing COVID cases, extreme weather, and escalating political tension, election day — tomorrow — is filling most of us with intense emotion.

It feels to me like being in a state of suspended animation. Many people describe it as a collective holding of breath.

And holding your breath for any extended period of time — either physically or metaphorically — is never a good idea.

Why?

When you hold your breath for more than a short time, a cascade of problematic physical responses result. You decrease oxygen flow to the brain, your heart rate drops, CO₂ and other dangerous gases build up in your blood, and none of that is healthy.

And when you feel as though you are holding your breath emotionally, you put yourself in a heightened state of anxiety. Anxiety impacts your mood, and it also impacts your body. Your heart may pound, you may develop headaches, experience GI problems, have trouble sleeping, and more.

Today, and in the days to come, you can support yourself to stay emotionally steady with these 3 practices.

1. Start breathing with intention

Yes, your breath is a tool that can help you in many ways. When you breathe deeply and slowly, the stress responses in your body are reduced.

Sit quietly for a minute or two — or a bit longer. Breathe in fully, all the way into your belly. Pause a moment and then exhale very slowly. As few as three long slow belly breaths like this will help.

As you breathe this way, you will feel a gentle release of tension. Let your shoulders drop and relax. Aim to bring that softness into all the muscles in your body — from the top of your head, to your jaw and neck, and down to your toes.

Repeat breathing breaks like this often.

2. Move your body

Choose a way that appeals to you to get yourself in motion.

If you are a runner, or love yoga, those are great ways to get moving. But there are very simple ways that work well, too.

In just five to 10 minutes you can stretch and shake out your body. Get some music on and dance. Or take a brisk walk around the block.

Getting the blood flowing like this releases natural chemicals that enhance your sense of well-being.

3. Get creative

When you start creating you have a great outlet for anxiety or other difficult emotions.

You can write a poem or pour your thoughts out in a journal. Try using color and draw or paint. You might cook, play music, dance, sing, garden, build something, knit, or create in any way you can think of.

Why not invite someone to create with you? Is there someone you live with who would enjoy sharing some creative time mid-day? Or take a short creative break on Zoom with a friend or a small group.

Creating is a remarkable effective way to unload big emotion, feel more energy and maybe even feel joy.

Whatever happens in the world around us, we need to be our best selves.

We all need to show up, we all need to go on. We need to bring our best selves to everything we do.

Start with you.

When you are on steady footing, you will be a better leader to everyone around you.

You will be a better partner and friend, a better parent, a better colleague, and better at the work you do in the world. Your work matters now as much or more than ever.

We have all lived through fraught times before. We can move forward in the face of challenges.

On this important day remember that we all need to keep leading.

That’s how we move into a better future.

Stay safe and well, and keep creating.

The big and the small

In my new weekly Zoom calls (I hosted my fourth one on Sunday), and in client conversations and chats with colleagues, I am observing how people are adjusting to the remarkable time we are living through.

It is great that we are sharing so many ways we care for ourselves, cope with fear, take action, create, and serve. I am delighted at how many people are now reporting that they feel balanced, more creative, grounded, hopeful, adaptive, lucky, connected, strong, OK, and fine — all words that have been used by people in recent calls.

But some reported more difficult emotions, like petrified, at loose ends, disconnected, and waiting impatiently. And, people on the front-lines of this pandemic are stressed in countless ways.

It’s important to acknowledge that whatever our circumstances we all have ups and downs. 

We may feel like we’re doing ok and still experience signs — obvious and subtle — that we are going through a process, day by day.

Here are a few examples of what we can minimize as “small stuff.”

Many of us are not sleeping well. I have good nights, but many more fitful nights than had even been usual for me (and I hear this from others). This is a clear signal that while I may feel that I am doing well, there’s a lot about this period that is different, and my subconscious seems to be working overtime.

Many of us deeply feel the isolation. Whether it’s a longing for a loved one to be closer, or a forced distance from people we want to embrace, or the feeling that zoom meetings are simply not sufficient to connect as we want with others, this emotion sits in the heart with a sadness that is real.

Many people are finding small daily tasks to be a challenge. Things that had never required much thought — like access to fresh food, bringing packages safely into our homes, or finding necessities that are in short supply — might feel like subtle annoyances, but can actually cause a real sense of distress (not to mention that these things demand far more of our time and attention than they ever used to). 

All of these “small things” add up.

And there are small steps to take that will help, no matter what you are experiencing.

1. Structure your time

Consider the ideal pace and plan for your days. Use your calendar to schedule blocks of time — for meals, exercise, work, quiet, outreach, learning, helping your children with school work, volunteering, entertainment, creating, etc. 

You do not need to do everything every day! Choose the days and times for what you want and need, and block them in. 

Whether you are busy or have more open time than you are used to, creating predictability is a very effective form of self-care.

2. Move!

Getting exercise each day has huge benefits. Make that one element of your scheduled time every day — but do vary the ways you exercise, if you want. 

Lift weights (even if that’s with canned foods rather than dumbbells). Look for online yoga or other exercise instructors. Walk outdoors. Dance. And stretch often, when seated for long peroids of time.

Feeling strong helps you to feel agency in your life, in addition to keeping your body fit.

3. Pick some go-to resources and use them

I have created a new page on my site called Thriving Now, that includes many ways you can do just that — thrive! 

Look for a technique or practice or other resource that sparks your interest. Try out different things. Find your favorites (there are many options you are unlikely to have seen suggested elsewhere) and build them into your daily routine. 

All of the things on the list (and some are very small) are tools that I and others have shared that are big ways to support ourselves — during this unique time, and long after we have moved through it. 
 

Because we will move through this time. Many things are likely going to be different after it is safe to leave our homes. My hope is that as we move through these days with thoughtfulness and intention, we will find insights for better, more conscious ways to live and work in the future.

I am here. I want to support you.

My next Creating Our Way Forward Zoom call will be on Saturday, April 11. Join me and the wonderful group of big-hearted women from all over the country who have been coming together to connect, share, learn new ways to navigate in these challenging times, and stay inspired. 

There’s a link to register for the call on the Thriving Now page, or you can register here for the call.

And, for deeper support, to blast through a personal or business matter you are facing, I have created special Create Your Way Forward Sprint Sessions. Can you imagine the way that focused support can propel you forward now? I’d be glad to share the details with you. 

Stay safe and well, and keep creating.