A Mother’s Day reflection

On the morning of Mother’s Day, I sat at my dining room table with piles of family photos around me. I have been tasked with sorting through mountains of images that were shipped to me from from my mother and father’s house. They are both gone now, and their house was recently sold.

I have been devoting a day here and there to this monumental task for many weeks, and there are still two unopened cartons waiting to be explored.

On Sunday I found treasures that touched me deeply.

Connecting to people we love

How perfect it was to see my mother at age 20, and her mother, their smiles shining in a family scene from a time before she was married. It was a wonderful start to Mother’s Day.

A photo of my mother and father beaming on their honeymoon was a sweet sight.

As I went through the envelopes, I saw my parents and grandparents at many ages and in many settings. I saw my great-grandmother, who I remember meeting as a little girl. I saw my dear mother-in-law and father-in-law, often at holiday tables where both sets of my grandparents were part of the scene.

There were photos of me at many ages — taken as a girl on the beach, as a gawky teenager, with my new husband and all through the years. I gazed at photos with aunts and uncles, my children, sisters, cousins, nieces and nephews, family friends.

I smiled wistfully at memories of those who are gone, and marveled at the changes in all of us over time. (Oh, the hairstyles and clothing choices!)

What struck me deeply is the link I have to so many people who came before me and after I arrived.

I marveled at the links to a past that goes back beyond imagination, and that extends into the future as well.

The power of deep connection

What shined though vividly as I looked at all of the photos is the love that has connected all of us, and continues to connect us.

Not that every family relationship has always been harmonious. As in most families, we experienced strains of varying intensity.

Yet the bonds are significant.

And the message that resonates clearly for me is that we are all linked by love.

I also believe that deep love creates light.

My parents and their parents — and the generations before them — all lit the way for the ones who came next, as we light the way to the future.

We can light the world

I believe that when we come together, in our families and our connections to others, those connections have energy.

And that energy emits light — a light that can be sensed, if not seen, by those around us.

Further, I believe that clear light can guide us to a future of love. Of connection. Of peace.

I am inspired to be a catalyst for connections that build love, and, in turn, light.

I believe we can do this in our families, in close relationships, and in professional relationships.

We can be the light together.

Together we can bring more love into a world that needs it.

I hope you will join me.

Transform your world with love

This week love is celebrated around the world. (Shop windows in Paris were full of hearts in pink and red when I was there last week.) How special and sweet!

I invite you to pause and consider the breadth of what love is and can be, and ways you can create and share it.

Because it’s magical that love can be created — in many meaningful ways!

How do you love?

Love has many dimensions, and some are commonly overlooked. Let’s dive in.

We typically focus on romantic love.

Love shared in relationships is what most people think about when February 14 rolls around. Dinners out, flowers, sweets are the expressions of love most of us share with special people in our lives.

Whether your life is filled with romance, or you long for romantic love, there is always an opportunity to bring the energy of this kind of love into your life.

Think about how you can create beauty in your environment. Light candles, treat yourself to flowers, listen to wonderful music, savor flavors of special foods, initiate meaningful conversations. visit special places that light up your heart.

Whether with a partner, family, friends or on your own, you can create love and joy in countless ways.

The importance of cultivating self-love cannot be overstated.

Cultivating deep self-love not only helps you to be happier each day, it provides a foundation that enables you to abundantly love others and to spread love wherever you go. 

And, yes, the concept is uncomfortable for many people. Women often tell me they feel selfish just thinking about the idea of self-love.

You can gently start to create a self-love practice. Take baby steps at first and keep going.

Begin by focusing on your talents and gifts. Fully acknowledge how special you are! Also think about how worthy you are of happiness, love, and goodness of every kind in your life. You may want to do some brief journaling about the particulars of your special talents, and your worthiness, when you start or end your day.

To help you to fully embrace and embody those ideas, smile lovingly at yourself in the mirror when you greet yourself at the start of your day, and before bed each evening.

Put your hands on your heart as you look into your eyes with love. Leave judgement behind. See and acknowledge the true, deep beauty in your reflection. 

And now it’s time to begin to focus on accepting and loving the parts of you that are not perfect — the parts that feel unworthy, or are critical of others, or are prone to anger or anxiety or bitterness, or are quick to judge.

When you can love and accept all of who you are, it will become easier to give yourself grace. You are likely to notice that you can gently release the intensity of those parts that you have struggled with.

As you make self-love a practice, you will also find it easier to feel love and spread love to others.

Be a generator of love in the world.

There are endless opportunities to create love that will not only enrich your heart, but enrich those around you.

Consider how you can orient your thinking and actions to love.

For example, if someone cuts you off in traffic, they may be struggling with any number of stresses. I have found rather than cursing at such people, I wish them love — because they clearly seem to need it. (And I notice that doing that makes me feel better.)

Small loving acts, such as helping someone by holding the door for them, or acknowledging and thanking someone who provided an extra touch, or sending a note to someone you have not seen in a while to brighten their day, are examples of generating tidbits of love that are meaningful for both the recipient and you.

When you actively focus on ways to infuse love in the world, that loving energy spreads widely. The recipient of your love is likely to generate more love, a thus the ripple effects extend way beyond what you will likely ever know.

When more and more of us live as creators of love, our impact is incalculable.

This is how we can build the world with love.