Finding Hope and Joy in Paris

Last week I left for Paris to lead my first overseas retreat. My dream of bringing a group of wonderful women to France for 12 days, to explore Paris and then spend time in the gorgeous French countryside, was about to become a reality.

And so it has.

It has been a remarkable week in many ways. And mixed with great delight, we have been processing the heartbreak we all feel following the outcome of the election.

Being in a city as magical as Paris, with the opportunity to share art in fabulous museums, culture, history, and food has been a privilege. And as we have moved through these days I am gaining perspective and insight.  

Emotions must be honored

Whatever one feels in any given situation, the emotions need time and space — to be felt, and to be processed if they are troubling. 

The key is to keep from being stuck in difficult emotions, so you do not fall into despair.

For despair leads to hopelessness, and that is no place to stay (for your own sake and others’).

Hope, on the other hand, provides you with a feeling of agency and possibility. It inspires action, and action is a great antidote to fear and anxiety.

Cultivate hope like you cultivate a garden

To look for ways to feel hopeful, remember that you are filled with love. You have abundant creative power. And you have a voice.

Actively look for beauty and soak it in.

Allow yourself to feel love and give love to others.

Take positive action (even small action) in tandem with others who want to create a world where kindness, love, peace, freedom and justice prevail. The collective potential of like-minded people is considerable.

What I am learning in Paris

Being in the city my father grew up in, I am recalling that he was remarkably resilient and resourceful.

He never gave up — when the Germans invaded France in World War II, he and his family took brave action to leave. They made a new life in a new country and were proud Americans.

When his brother (and business partner) died suddenly at age 42, he kept going. When his business failed several years later, after a trusted person embezzled from him, he came back and succeeded again.

When he lost my mother and was truly heartbroken, he smiled lovingly at her picture each day for the rest of his life. He found joy in his return trips to his beloved Paris.

He always looked ahead with hope.

He modeled hope for me, as I am committed to doing for others. 

And so I am living each day here focused on opening to the adventures we are sharing. I am cherishing the company of magnificent women, and am in awe of the exceptional creativity we have taken in in each museum we’ve visited. I am savoring fabulous meals and how my senses are awakened. I am feeling tremendous gratitude for the joy of this experience, knowing it is fortifying my heart and spirit for the path ahead.

I believe the joy of this experience, for me and the women I am sharing these experiences with, is adding positive, creative, hopeful energy to the world, and that we will all return home with even more of that energy.

I am sharing some photos I have taken in the last week with the hope that you can feel the joy, feel hopeful, and sense the creative power you are filled with.

Do you struggle when things go south?

As much as we strive to do our best and steer our lives with intention, it’s inevitable that we experience setbacks, disappointments, and failures.

The feelings we experience in those situations can range from annoyed to frustrated to crushed.

And it’s in those moments that fear and doubt can take over.

So, how can you respond instead?

Ask yourself this question:

“Where are the gifts?”

Even the most challenging situations can offer us gifts.

The pandemic we have lived through comes immediately to mind, but life is frequently messy. We lose people we love. We get fired from a job or lose a major client. Relationships fall apart. Project outcomes fall short.

When there are big hits, or small events that don’t go well, we have the opportunity to choose the lens through which to look.

When we look for them, we can find gifts, both small ones, and often bigger gifts.

Here are some gifts to look for

When you look for the gifts in any situation, you are oriented to the positive, and that helps you feel better in the moment. You can see opportunities and possibilities. Your energy shifts in ways that turn any situation around faster.

The gifts can be small and subtle — and those are terrific.

You might consider posing questions like these:

• What lessons can I take away from this disappointment or failure?

• What opportunities might be opening up, that I can see now?

• How can I appreciate kindness that was offered to me?

• How can I appreciate and celebrate the ways I took a risk, or spoke up, or created something in a new way, or helped in a situation?

• What new ways to work, or connect, or create, or think are possible now?

• Where has space opened up for things I like or want to do, such as cooking, getting outdoors, playing an instrument, learning something I’ve been curious about?

• What if it’s possible that new and better things will soon be coming, that I cannot even see right now?

Can you envision how referring to this list of questions could help you steer clear of an emotional nose-dive?

Any of them can help you shift your perspective, support you emotionally, and help you move forward in a more positive way.

Consider how you can use these ideas each day

We always have the opportunity to view our circumstances with fresh eyes and choose the way to move forward.

Even in small moments when you find yourself feeling let down or disappointed, think positively and consider that good can lie ahead.

And think creatively. Because we can create all the time.

Consider that in every moment, and with every choice we make for what to say or do next, we have a creative opportunity.

Leave a comment to share the ways you have chosen a positive frame of mind, and created your way forward when challenges have shown up in your life.

And if you want to talk about how to bring more creative activation into your life, to move beyond what limits you, let’s talk. I’d be glad to help you gain new insights and perspectives on what’s in the way, as well as what’s possible for you. Click here to find a spot on my calendar.

Stay safe and well, and keep creating.