Why to watch your words

The words we use have more power than most of us realize. It’s interesting that we typically pay more attention to how we communicate with others than how we speak to ourselves.

When you consider how you speak to yourself, you may be surprised at what you notice and surprised at the big impact this awareness can have.

Two kinds of self-talk to watch out for

The messages you send yourself

Self-talk is that chatter in your head, that most of don’t pay much attention to. It can often take the form of doubt, as in, “You can’t do that,” or, “Why even try?” It can sound like, “Who do you think you are?” 

And negative self-talk often includes a multitude of “shoulds.” How many time a day do you tell yourself, “I should... ”? 

A  variation of a “should” statement is one like, “Everyone expects that I will...”

These may show up so frequently that they feel “normal.” But this self-talk is insidious. 

Can you notice when thoughts like these crop up? Awareness is a key first step to shifting to new, more self-compassionate, more positive ways of thinking.

The way you send yourself signals

When you want to change a habit, or do something new and differently, you may be inadvertently making it harder on yourself because of the words you use.

Here’s an example: 

If you want to get more exercise, you might say, “I’m trying to get to the gym more often.” If you change that statement to, ”I go to the gym twice a week,” you declare something clearly, and signal yourself specifically. This small change will have a big impact.

Another way new signals can work for you is when things are a struggle. If you think, “I just can’t stop eating sugar,” try this instead: “I am cutting back day by day, but haven’t been able to cut all sugar from my diet yet.”

Adding the word “yet” gives your subconscious mind an important signal. You won’t feel defeated, and are thus likely to continue your efforts and feel more motivated. You will gently encourage yourself that this is a process and you are making progress.

Change starts with awareness

Spend the day with a bit of observation about your self-talk. You may want to keep some notes about the messages you are sending yourself, and how you are choosing your words.

Are you sending negative messages or encouraging, loving messages to yourself?

Do you see any patterns in your self-talk observations?  

Where do you have opportunities to make small adjustments that will lead to better outcomes?

All of the messages you send yourself are important. Your words have power. As you speak to yourself with more care and intention, your life will begin changing in beautiful ways. 

Leave a comment to let me know what you observe, and the impact of your awareness.

And, if having support to help you make small changes — that are key to making bigger changes in your life — feels like a smart step as you are thinking about what’s next, or if you feel stuck, or you are facing a big transition, let’s make a date to talk about how private Creative Core Coaching might be a life-changing resource for you. 

I have just opened two spots for one-on-one coaching. And with all of the activity that’s been developing around my book, Live Big: A Manifesto for a Creative Life, I don’t know when I will be taking on new private clients after this. 

If you are ready to take a serious step to start living the big life you know is possible, it can start here.