The power of your mindset may surprise you

I have lots of conversations with women who are contemplating their lives and their futures. I listen to them describe the desires they have and the challenges that stand in their way. As I listen, I tune in to their orientation to themselves and the world.

I listen for signs of a mindset that is limited, or what Carol Dweck calls a “fixed mindset,” as well as indicators that they have what Dweck calls a “growth mindset” in her renowned book, Mindset.

I call that an expansive mindset.

Why do I pay attention to that?

Because the deep work I do with my clients leads to success for those with many characteristics of an expansive mindset.

Someone with a deeply fixed mindset is not able to benefit in the same way. A fixed mindset will not only frustrate her, it will frustrate me.

Your mindset can support you to becoming a powerful creator

Your outlook on the world impacts how you live each day — and how you can begin to live an even more satisfying life tomorrow than today.

And while none of us embodies a expansive mindset in every dimension of our lives, those of us who begin with (or endeavor to fully develop) an expansive mindset have a smoother path to creating a life that truly satisfies them — what I call living big.

What, specifically, does an expansive mindset look like?

• You have an expansive mindset when you appreciate your gifts and talents. And you believe that you can develop and expand those talents and skills.

• You see potential and believe that you can figure things out, rather than being pessimistic or allowing yourself to feel defeated.

• You learn to add a powerful little word to sentences like these: “I don’t know how to do that,” or “I can’t accomplish my goal.” By changing statements like those to: “I don’t know how to do that yet,” and “I haven’t yet accomplished my goal,” you are open and ready and motivated to continue and succeed.

• You believe that you can always learn and grow.

• You believe that you can figure things out — yourself, or with help.

• You try new things without fear. You experiment, and when early attempts fall short, you refine and try new approaches. You focus on solutions, believing in your ability as a creator to find solutions.

• You take consistent action. This means you focus on the journey, not just the destination.

• You learn from every new experience — the great ones, and the tough ones — knowing all of them inform you and help you continue to learn and grow.

• You don’t compare yourself to others (which is always a bad idea). Rather, you are inspired by others, and you can support, encourage and celebrate them — even if they are “ahead” of you in some ways.

• You are true to yourself and your values.

• You keep fear at bay. This doesn't mean you don’t ever feel fear, but you learn to keep it from stopping or limiting you.

• You are open and curious, you listen, and you learn.

• You believe that life is good, even when you are moving through rough patches. When the going is tougher (which is inevitable from time to time), you shift to hope and optimism. You trust yourself.

• You surround yourself with others who are like-minded, who also approach the world with an expansive mindset.

Do you see yourself in this list?

Few of us can “check off” all the boxes on the list above! Even those who have focused on personal development and are doing well need to return to practices that keep them on course with an expansive mindset.

And those who have not yet embarked on personal development work may have more than a few unchecked boxes. That’s ok.

When you start with enough of a foundation in an expansive mindset, and a deep desire to grow and create your ideal life, you can step up to developing more of it.

And you can stay on course, too, especially when you have good tools and when you have support.

Are you looking to leverage your expansive mindset for more growth?

If you want to step up in your life to become the biggest and best version of yourself, and start creating the future you deeply desire, I invite you to share your challenges and your dreams with me. You can also learn how I may be able to help you make those dreams a reality.

Let’s hop on a call. Click here to grab a spot on my calendar. I promise you will gain new insights and perspective on what’s possible for you.

Stay safe and well, and keep creating.

2.9.21, 5am...

It was 5:00am one morning last week, and this is what poured out onto the page when I could not sleep:

Right now it’s too much. Too much to do, too much to keep up with. More than I can do. More than I want to do.

I need space. Space for rest. Space for me. Space to be. Space to paint. Time for more movement. Yoga again! Reading!

Grace. Ease.

Help. Lots of it.

Simplify. Time with Steven. Go outside. Feel the snow. Breathe the air — everyday!!!

What can I postpone? Look and do that.

Block lots of time on my calendar for me. End the day earlier.

I cannot continue this way. And I will not.

Can you relate?

When clients work with me, they often think I have everything figured out.

Sure, they know that I’ve had challenges in the past, but they are certain that I have overcome them and live a perfectly balanced life — which is what so many of them are seeking.

The truth?

I do live a significantly different (and happier) life than I had a decade ago. But even as we learn and make big changes in our lives, the challenges we have faced before crop up again.

We are tested over and over.

Why did I find myself coming to all of this pre-dawn awareness after having made so many important changes in my life in the last decade?

Because the drivers that had made my “old” life so intense for so long tend to creep up on me if I fail to stay alert to them.

It is easy for me to drift back into an over-busy life, where I am not taking the consistent actions that I started to adopt a decade ago.

Slowing down and being still, really listening to my heart, and taking time to see wonder all around me every day can get crowded out with long lists of to-do’s.

Fully embracing gratitude, focusing on self-love, and allowing myself to feel free can fall by the wayside.

That's when my biggest challenges — letting fear influence me, and not focusing on being patient, so I can allow all the things I am working toward to unfold as they are meant to — really try and step in to sabotage me.

Getting back on course

Personal transformation is a process! It’s never one-and-done. We do the work to grow and develop new and better ways to live and work, and inevitably find that old challenges crop up again.

But when they show up, we are different than when we began the journey.

We can spot the problems earlier, before they wreak havoc as they used to. And we have tools and insights to return to, so we can begin to consistently bring those practices back into our lives and more quickly get on track.

I took my pre-dawn rant into a conversation with my coach, and with her brilliant guidance I made connections at a deeper level than ever before about what the underlying factors were that I could address — and powerful ways to bring big change into my life now.

We can always learn more and do more

We never “get there” — to a place of perfection and total ease.

We continually grow and expand, and even though we hit rough patches again and again, that growth is amazing!

I find it incredibly inspiring to gain new perspectives and deeper clarity as I move along my journey. As my life unfolds and I experience periodic set-backs, I can spot them and address them, and they become instructive.

Rather than festering and causing damage, I see them and learn from them. That’s how they bring me the gifts of new levels of change and expansion in my life.

And for that I am filled with gratitude.

Are you ready to start — or continue — your journey?

You may feel overwhelmed for any number of reasons.

You may be focused on everyone else’s well-being, and not your own.

You may have dreams you’ve put on hold or dreams you want to realize faster with guidance.

You may simply feel stuck or in a deep rut.

Whether you have addressed these challenges in the past and want to make your next move forward, or you want to begin a journey to transform your life, I applaud you for knowing you want to find a guide to help you.

I am happiest when I am in conversation with accomplished women who want to explore the real stuff that’s in their way now, and connect to a vision for the lives they want to create.

I invite you to have a conversation like that. I promise to provide you with new insights and perspectives. Perhaps I can help you create the life you want and deserve — and, if either of us feels the fit is not good, that’s absolutely fine.

It’s easy to book a Live Big Breakthrough Call with me, or email me and we’ll make a date to talk.

Stay safe and well, and keep creating.

What will your wake-up call lead to?

Have you ever had a “wake-up call” that changed your awareness in some way?

I received an email the other day with a story that indicated a wake-up call had occurred. It was not dramatic or earth-shattering, but as I read it the note, I could see how meaningful it was.

Awareness was opened in a notable way. And that awareness lead to important impact.

What can happen when you explore

The woman who wrote to me shared a story that began when she watched a documentary that I have recommended to many people in recent weeks.

The 13th (that’s titled after the Thirteenth Amendment to the Constitution, and available on Netflix and YouTube) opened my eyes about the history of race, justice and mass incarceration in our country. It brings to light the ways that the decades of policy since the end of the Civil War have contributed to so many ills that people of color have suffered, and continue to suffer, today.

What happened after she watched the documentary was remarkable.

She described a conversation she had with a close friend, soon after watching The 13th, in which she explored a new awareness about language that most of us use without a second thought — language that carries deep pain for so many.

She shared that the conversation she had was meaningful, for her and for her friend, and that she is now more aware of many subtle ways that pain like that is inadvertently and routinely perpetuated.

This was a powerful insight, for which she is grateful.

When we are open to new learning we gain so much

In addition to the day-to-day focus we have on our families and our work, we can invite enrichment into our lives.

We are enriched when we learn, and we can gain important new awareness. When we have a wake-up call related to subtle ways we have been uniformed, it can be incredibly valuable.

And we can take that new awareness a step further.

By bringing the awareness into a conversation, or when we consider things we used to say, or do, or write without a second thought, and consciously make a change, we grow and expand.

Not only do we benefit, we impact those around us.

And in that way, we impact the world.

Amazing, isn’t it?

How will you take a step to look for more knowledge?

You may dive in to explore more that is related to systemic racism, and the impact it has in our society.

You may want to learn more about another challenge that concerns you — the environment, educational inequities, poverty, homelessness, the pandemic, the state of our democracy, and more.

These are all excellent possibilities.

Exploring and learning = taking action

And, talking with others is important action, too. It not only expands your own awareness, you share your new awareness.

In turn, others are likely to become more aware and initiate or contribute to more conversations. And so the impact grows.

This is what leadership looks like

When you develop awareness about an issue or problem you want to help address, and are motivated to help resolve it, you are poised to proceed in any number of ways.

I always recommend that you start with small, conscious efforts, and build from there as you wish. Seek inspiration from others. Invite collaboration. Think creatively to devise a range of interesting approaches to pursue.

When you stay aligned with your values and step forward with courage you are leading, and modeling for others to do the same. You are impacting the world in your unique and important way.

The world needs the greatness in all of us.

We can each step into our power.

We can all live big.

I invite you to consider the impact you want to have — in your personal life, in your work, and in the world — by stepping into your power, and living all of your greatness.

Schedule a Live Big Breakthrough Call with me. I’ll help you gain insight and clarity about what you want to create in your life, the impact you want to have, and challenges or questions that may be limiting you. And if we both think there’s a good fit, I can tell you about a new coaching program I have created that’s starting soon, and how it may be able to support you to create the future you want.  

I look forward to hearing from you.

Stay safe and well, and keep creating

Books I love and recommend, plus a few cool articles

There are new books and articles published all the time, and lots of great staples related to creativity. Here are a few of the books that connect to expanding creativity that I find myself returning to — and recommending to my clients — over and over.

The Artist’s Way
Julia Cameron

Creative Confidence: Unleashing the Creative Potential Within Us All 
Tom Kelley and David Kelley

The War of Art: Break Through the Blocks and Win Your Inner Creative Battles
Steven Pressfield

Making Art a Practice: 30 Ways to Paint a Pipe (How to Be the Artist You Are)
Cat Bennet

---

Paul Graham's article, How to Do What You Love, is candid and brilliant, with clear thinking about how we come to comprehend the concept as children, the traps of prestige, the impact of money, and the power of always producing. (“‘Always produce’ will discover your life’s work the way water, with the aid of gravity, finds the hole in your roof.”)

This recommended article is actually an NPR story about the way that Texas musician Bob Schneider started “The Song Game” with other musicians. It has helped all of them to beat procrastination, ward off self-criticism and create brilliantly. You can read the story but I recommend you also listen to the way it aired. You'll be inspired!

A short article with some sound tips you may appreciate is 7 Steps You Need to Take to Be Creative at Work. A companion article is 6 Ways to Be Creative Absolutely All the Time.

Another short article with some sound tips you may appreciate is 7 Steps You Need to Take to Be Creative at Work. A companion article is 6 Ways to Be Creative Absolutely All the Time.

I’d love for you to comment below and share your favorite books, as well as articles you’ve found with big, inspiring ideas about creativity.