5 Techniques to move through fear

Fear is a universal experience. So are tough emotions such as anger, worry and desperation.

These powerful forces challenges all of us.

Today, let’s look at fear and how to move through and past it. (Stay tuned for emails about other difficult emotions, that will follow soon.)

We all feel fear!

Sometimes that fear is related to something that puts us, or someone we care about, in mortal danger. More often we are afraid of things that are not actually dangerous.

Because our lizard brains were wired in ancient times, when mortal danger was frequently a risk, we instinctively find ourselves experiencing fear.

Happily, we have far less danger in the modern world, and there are a number of good ways to end that suffering no matter the cause.

Common advice falls short

I have heard well-meaning people advise that you can tell yourself that fear is not real, and that doing that will make the fear go away.

But when you are afraid, you are responding to something that feels very real to you. In my experience, and observing others, being told that fear is not real, so just let it go, is not helpful.

What to do instead

Of course, fear can have a different degree of hold on you at different times, and depending on what brought it on.

Sometimes a small shift in thinking and perspective can work wonders, or employing a new way of responding can do the trick.

Try some or all of these techniques and see what works for you.

1. The power of hope

No matter what the fear relates to, bringing hopefulness to mind can make you feel much better. 

Hope is powerful. It helps reduce the anxiety that can accompany fear. As you focus on hope and more positive thoughts appear, the fear that gripped you will begin to recede.

2. The power of love

It may surprise you to learn that another great antidote to fear is love. Actively bringing a focus to love — for yourself, for someone else (even the person you feel anger toward), for the world — produces chemicals in the brain that reduce fearful thinking. 

Then, whatever made you feel afraid can be considered with a calmer, clearer and more hopeful frame of mind.

3. The power of awareness

The fear you feel may be sending you a signal — that you have a desire to try something new (like a physical challenge) or go for something different (like an exciting new job) — and that your fear is there to help you resist giving it a try.

The fear may be trying to protect you from the possibility of failing, or embarrassment. 

The truth is, you will never know if you can or will succeed (right off the bat or after several restarts), until you try. 

And if this kind of fears shows up, remind yourself that it does not entail mortal danger.

4. The power of choice

The truth is that in any situation, we can choose a new way of thinking and a new way of responding.

We can choose to bring a new perspective to the matter. We can choose to look at our circumstance through a new lens.

We can also choose to trust — ourselves and our creative thinking, and particular people who can support us. 

When you hold the awareness in your mind of all the choices you can employ, and practice using those choices, you can cope with things that have felt really hard in the past.

5. The power of gratitude

The science is clear. When you focus on gratitude, levels of the stress hormone cortisol get lower. This works to block toxic emotions of many kinds. 

Neurological studies show that your brain cannot be in a state of appreciation and fear at the same time. When you focus on what you have and what is good, and not on what you lack or fear, the fearful feelings fall away.

Email me to share the approach, or approaches that work best for you.